And So We Begin…

LIS AND PAT Our great uncle, Jennings Tofel, was an Expressionist painter, essayist and poet. He was born in 1891 and died in 1959, one year after he drew our portraits. He was drenched in the culture of his time. We honor him with our profile picture (avatar) and plan to devote at least one blog to him and his works. BTW, we don’t look like very giddy kiddies in these drawings because our motha forced us to have them done. We were furious. She was right.

Are you kidding? There’s nothing new that’s fit to print? 500 million plus blog writers believe there’s plenty of new stuff left to print. And we agree. The challenge is getting people to read what we print. The competition is fierce.

Over the years, we two Giddy Biddies, have picked up a ginormous sticky bucket of fresh perceptions, new insights, sage advice, unique perspectives and maybe even a few new truths regarding a lot of the stuff everyone else has already written about. And all we are asking is give our sticky, overflowing bucket a chance.

So how did we come up with the brilliant name Giddy Biddies? Simple. Giddy is about the incessant out of control laughing we’ve been doing every time we’re together since Uncle Jennings sketched us. And Biddies is about our combined 142 years of life on earth.

And why now? Having survived the Covid Plague (so far) it occurred to us if we’re gonna share our wisdoms with the likes of you, we had better hurry up and get it done because who would have thunk, shit happens, life is short, a bird in hand, here today gone tomorrow, reality bites, etc.

And so we begin. This first post should give you a sense of who we are, our blogability and some of the topics we intend to write about. We’ve decided the best way to introduce ourselves is by writing to each other about each other.

LIS writes to Norg*, Yes! Just by being born, you disrupted my perfect little two and a half years old world. I probably did try to flush you down the bassinet (Shirley’s story**). I definitely forced you to be Prince whenever we played Prince and Princess. And it’s true after we watched Peter Pan with Mary Martin I tried to fly you off Mom and Dad’s canopy bed. These incidents, my darling sister, and others far more challenging, demonstrate how you have managed to overcome rivalry, control and much worse to become patient, loving, cultured, spiritual and even mystical. Yes. Mom and Dad were focused on your gorgeous singing voice with no clue about your brilliant mind. Indeed you sang some serious opera but there was and is so much more to the multi-faceted person you have always been. Your life, so far, has taken you on a serendipitous path through growing up on Long Island, motherhood, divorce, marrying the same guy twice, gender discrimination, anti-semitism, living in Manhattan, living in New Jersey, living in Texas, living in Maryland, living in Florida, studying and embracing the Torah, considering Omer and Kabbalah, becoming a Cantor and then a Rabbi, standing up for diversity and human rights, overcoming cancer, aging gracefully, writing beautifully, eating too much pasta and ice cream—always determined, fearless and undaunted. And through all of it you have retained your extraordinary wit and sense of humor. When we’re together I laugh so hard I pee through my Poise pads. I always wear two when I’m with you! You are my best friend. You are exceedingly kind and compassionate. You listen. You hear. You are always available for me–no matter. I adore you.

*Norg is the nickname we Giddy Biddies have called each other since 1960ish–likely derived from the love sounds we made when we petted our Collie dog. The Norg name has absolutely nothing to do with the 1987 character Shumi Norg, Garden Master of Balamb Garden from Final Fantasy FFVIII.

**Shirley’s story is about LIS pulling out the drain plug on PAT’s bassinet. The story was repeated ad nauseam by Shirley Tofel Ernest, our mother, who passed away in 2010. She was a retired teacher who read the New York Times from cover to cover every day. She loved the feel of the newsprint. She was a closet poet who worshipped Emily Dickinson and Elizabeth Barrett Browning. She believed in Ecology and Women’s rights. She had great passion for the Arts. We miss her terribly.

PAT writes to Norg. In the beginning I called you Bibbabi because I couldn’t pronounce Elisabeth. Later we started calling each other Norg. But we continue to say it in a special Norg voice – Noooooooorg! — kind of nasal and very silly –with our lips pursed. Laughter. I remember the long drives we took in the family car from Long Island to Poughkeepsie to visit our relatives. We were in the back seat giggling about who knows what when all of a sudden a large hand attached to a long arm would swat at us from the driver’s seat–our dad, Charlie, who gave us laughter, silliness, and our sweet tooth. Oh. He had a dark side but he was giddy. Remember the time we fought over who would get the one remaining Entenmann’s donut? Like tigers! Of course, he won. Then he gleefully bit into it and it was hard as a rock—stale!! We laughed so hard it hurt!

Growing up, you were an incredibly kind and loving big sister. Your friends were my friends. I was thrilled to get your hand-me-downs. And smart – oh so smart. I had the voice; you had the smarts. And, from the time I was 9, you had an amazing boyfriend. However, mom and dad thought you were too young to date and also he was Catholic. So he would come over when they went out and I stood lookout on our wraparound balcony. As soon as their car pulled into the driveway, I would signal and Mike would escape via the other side of the balcony!! It was all very dramatic–like Romeo and Juliet. Finally, his parents and ours got together and proposed marriage. You were both 20 years old when you got married. And you’re still together!

I most admire your generosity and creative genius – your spirit pours into everything. You have been a patron of the arts for years and your beautiful home and End of the Beginning Garden in a forest in Pennsylvania was a paradise of strange and wonderful sculptures, paintings, and whimsical objects. Over the years, it became a haven for me from my turbulent life—a retreat center with a babbling brook and endless wonders to explore in the surrounding woods. The house personified you. There was even a little cottage you built for artists to stay in and be inspired.

Your love for the Arts and your advocacy for women’s body rights resulted in a collaborative musical theatre work called, “In My Body.” which you produced in Philadelphia in 2016. I think it was and still is a most imaginative and heart-rending expression of your inner soul. I shared the opening night with you and still marvel at the exquisite poetry of your heart. Everything you do is filled with your unique touch.

Aging and health issues motivated you and Mike to move to a smaller home in New Jersey between the ocean and the bay. This home is filled with curated objects from over 50 years of collecting—all coming together with your very special eye. Your photography of sunrises and sunsets and your shadow pictures are mystical and mysterious.

You have always been there for me. You are generous, filled with loving kindness and compassion. You are brilliant, funny, beautiful and matchless – truly your own person. From the beginning of our little kid giddiness to the moments we share now with each other and soon with our dear readers—I treasure the opportunity to join with you in this innovative and hopefully entertaining Blog—our Giddy Biddies Blog!

I was supposed to retire in 2021, but my congregation asked me to stay on for one more year. So, we Giddy Biddies are going to start off by writing one blog a monthish. And just so you don’t forget us in between blogs, we’ll post frequent giddy biddy bits of our wisdoms on Instagram @giddybiddiesblog and maybe Facebook too. Once I retire, our goal is to blog more often.

A few of the topics we may blog about, in no particular order, are: Crones. Am I my mother? Becoming sage. Opera. Old men. Collecting art. Love. The Cat Room. Long Island. Letting go. Well-rounded. Disabled. Poise pads. Marriage. God. Downsizing. Self-care. Dancing. Giving counsel. Poetry. Being a sexual being. Mystical. Curvy. Weed. Rights. Corona. The Omer. Prunes. Aging. Collaboration. My body belongs to me. Kids. Boobs. Remember these three words. Liberal arts. Prayer. Meditation. Qigong. Vaccines. Moving towards retirement. Husbands. Religion, Race, Nationality. Food. Giving. Amoral. Style. Producers. Gardens. Dropping body parts. Balance. Strength and Grace. Music. Grandkids. Laughter. Daughters. Kabbalah. Wrinkles. Genderful. Movies. Sons-in-law. A Woman of Valor. Regrets. Being rich. I used to be important. I’ll never buy another. The Golden Years.

Our blog is as much for us as it is for you.

With best wishes and all due respect,

LIS and PAT AKA Giddy Biddies